Contemplative

She’d slept well enough in Timur’s arms, though when she woke she lay awake, her mind on several things. She’d disentangled herself from Timur a few times – to eat or to use the bathroom, but then headed back to his side. She felt safe with his presence, and it was comforting to have him there while she thought over recent matters, despite him being dead asleep. 

In trying to think over the more pleasurable aspects of the previous evening, she found it difficult to focus just on what happened – particularly when she remembered Timur’s possessiveness. Her mind either hated her or was trying to remind or warn her of something, because it kept splicing the memory with flashes of her rape, and Blade’s possessiveness. it was enough to break her down and make her cry, which she did for a bit, clinging to Timur’s sleeping form as the panic attack rose and then later subsided. 

When she had calmed down, she wiped her eyes, and took a few deep breaths. She hadn’t wanted to taint a pleasant memory with a bad one, but it had happened anyway. She shook her head, trying to shake the thoughts away as she did so. Her mind still lingered on the previous evening, though not on the sex itself, but it’s aftermath. Charles’ presence had been unexpected, but she didn’t think it had exactly seemed unwelcome. Her thoughts lingered on his offer to ghoul her, and she spent time mulling it over.

She didn’t understand anything about the ghouling process and what it entailed, but knew that Timur had been a ghoul before being changed, and she knew that Michael, Chance, and Jacqueline were ghouls, and seemed perfectly fine. The offer was tempting – she’d be able to keep pace with Timur’s years, and still (theoretically) have her best friend by her side. It was saddening though, to think of losing her father. She would have had to watch him grow old anyway, but she could imagine the heartbreak it would cause Jacqueline, and almost didn’t want to do it. Still though, it was tempting.

Is this something I should bring up with Dad? she wondered, reaching across Timur to the nightstand for her phone. She pulled up the text window for her Dad, and immediately blushed. She’d forgotten about the picture he’d mistakenly sent. I should delete it. she thought, but instead found herself saving the image to the cloud before erasing the message history. Why she did it she couldn’t say, but she pushed it away from her mind, and started to text her Dad – until she remembered he hadn’t texted her back yet to give her the all clear. She erased what she had been typing and set her phone down with a sigh.

Refusing to think any further on the subject, she cuddled with Timur more, waiting for him to wake for the evening.

Tuesday

She’d left a little earlier than usual for school, taking the extra time to sit in one of the buildings and work on homework she hadn’t completed, until it was time to attend class. She did her best to take notes, though her scrawl was difficult to read. She was pulled aside by the Professor after class, however, for a talk.

“I just wanted to say Mandy, you’ve been doing well.”

“Thank you Professor.”

“I also wanted to let you know that I caught your performance on Friday. You were amazing.”

She smiled a little. “Thank you.”

“Don’t let your weekend performances interfere with your classwork though, ok?”

“Okay Professor. I won’t.”

“Have a good day.”

She nodded, and headed out of the classroom, feeling giddy that the Professor had singled her out. He was well-known in the industry, and to have him praise her meant a lot. Noting the time, she hurried – she was supposed to meet the girls for lunch, and didn’t want to be late. When she got to their usual table though, she didn’t find anyone. Setting down her lunch and her bag, she checked her phone – there was a text from Trish apologizing for not being at school that day – she was feeling ill. From Ilyana however there was nothing, so she texted her, hoping to hear back.

Hey Ilyana – hope everything’s ok.  a couple of minutes later, a response.

Yes – just spending some more time with my family while they are in town. Sorry for not letting you know. 

No problem – enjoy the time with your family.

She munched on her lunch alone, and came to a decision on something. She’d get more information about Charles’ offer, before potentially speaking to her Dad about it – though doing that at all was still up in the air. Scrolling though her contacts, she pulled up Charles’ number and called, knowing she’d have to leave a voicemail.

“Hi Charles.” she said after the beep. “It’s Mandy. Umm…when you have available time, I was wondering if maybe we could go over your offer in more detail, so that I understand things better. If you don’t have time, I understand – just thought I’d ask.”

She hung up and put her phone back into her purse, finished up her lunch and headed back to the rest of her classes for the day.