A Bad Idea

Lucius shouldered the backpack with his few supplies in it and headed out for the day. Ostensibly, he was going to put in some job applications. In reality, he was headed to a quiet part of the park. He found a bench away from the bulk of what people were present, and sat, putting his bag next to him. Part of him knew he should have perhaps consulted with someone first, but here he was, pulling out the phone that had been purchased for him and dialing his parents’ house. He couldn’t help but feel as though he were obligated to tell them he was alright.

“Hello?” it was his mother’s voice.

“Hi..” he cleared his throat. “Hi mom.”

“Lucius? Is that you?” he could practically see her frantically waving his dad over so he could hear.

“Yea mom, it’s me.” Sure enough, he was on speakerphone.

“Lucius, we called the hospital…they said  you weren’t there anymore, that you’d been released. We  haven’t known where you are or how you’re doing…they wouldn’t tell us anything.”

“Legally they can’t – it’s a HIPAA violation. I’m an adult now, remember?”

“Of course. You’re eighteen, I just – you’re my boy, i worry, you know?” she said. Then his dad spoke up. “Where are you?”

“I don’t…I think…”

“Sweetheart, why won’t you tell us?”

Because I’m afraid you’ll break me again. “I’m visiting Lucas.” he said, hoping that didn’t pinpoint his location.

“Why don’t you come home?”

“I have to stay in the area awhile. I need to stay in touch with my therapist.”

“Therapist?” there came a short, almost mocking laugh. “What are you in therapy for?”

“I…I gotta go mom.” This was a mistake.

Lucius…” he had hung up, however. His breathing picked up rapidly. The call had been a bad idea, and now he was worried that they would find him – find him, take him away and give him to the Vodunon. He didn’t want that – he didn’t want to be given to that man. His parents thought it was a high honor that the Vodunon wanted him.

His breath came in chocking gasps and, in a moment of terror, he looked around from one side to the next, then got up, grabbed his backpack, and shouldered it as he took off, looking for a safe place to be, a safe place to hide. I never should have made the call. They’re gonna figure it out, they’re gonna fine me and take me back. I don’t want to go back. It was the only thing that was running through his head.

Eventually, he found himself back outside the outreach center. He needed….he wasn’t sure what he needed, other than a safe place, and the only safe place he could think of was the outreach center. He took a couple of minutes to compose himself and headed inside and to his room, not wanting to alarm anyone unnecessarily. For now, he was going to rest, reset himself, and try to calm down and, hopefully, be ready to talk to someone about it later.

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