Nick found himself staring at the bottle of whiskey sitting on the kitchen table in front of him, an empty shot glass beside it. He’d had a hell of a weekend, and had already slipped up once, breaking his sobriety streak. A whimper sounded from next to him, and he felt a weight on his leg as his dog, Chase, looked up at him.
“I know boy.” he said, putting a hand on the dogs head before petting and giving him scratches behind the ear and pets. After, he stood up, wincing a little at the pain he still felt from the fight the day before. There had been improvement, to be sure, but not everything had gone away grabbed it, and headed into the kitchen. He stopped at the sink, unscrewing the cap before turning the bottle upside down, watching the contents swirl down the drain.
Leaning on the sink for a few minutes, his head hung, he thought about what he should be doing when he was tempted to drink. He ought to be calling his sponsor, but…well, he didn’t like her, and wanted as little a reason to contact her as possible. Instead, he threw the bottle away, and headed toward the bathroom to take a long, hot shower in an effort to ease the soreness.
While in the shower, his mind wandered over the events of the past four days, not sure what to stress over first — his sister, or his new job working for this mystery guy. Ultimately, he ended up stressing less over the job, and more over his sister. Just what had she been getting up to? She wasn’t owning up to him about anything, so who was she talking to? Should he just back off and focus on being supportive, so she would feel better about talking to him? He didn’t know what to do. Then there was this whole thing where she kept trying to set him up, this lasted time with her best friend’s older sister.
With a disgruntled sigh, he turned off the shower and toweled off before pulling a pair of boxers and shorts on. To the living room he went, turning on the TV and idly flipping through channels to take his mind off things and try to wind down before he went to bed. His mind kept turning back to Cindy though. Or, to be more specific, the concern over his dating life. It’s not like he’d never dated before…he just still wasn’t sure what kind of person he was into. More and more, he figured he was probably bi, but maybe a picky one. It also occurred to him though, that over the years he’d largely kept his dating life private since he had no idea where his preferences laid.
In high school, he’d been in an intense relationship with a guy named Ryan. They’d been going for two years when graduation time came around, and they’d largely managed to keep their relationship a secret from everyone. Nick because he was still unsure of himself, and Ryan because his family was phobic and wouldn’t accept their son being gay. Then, just a month or so before graduation — right before prom, in fact — they had a huge argument.
Nick had made the decision to join the Army as a way to help pay for school, since he hadn’t been able to earn any scholarships and didn’t want to take out any loans. Ryan was afraid for him, and hated the idea of him joining up and risking injury or death. They’d originally planned on going to the same school together, but when Nick didn’t get accepted, he changed his mind and planned to sign up. Ryan’s side of the argument was that he would be willing to go to a different school to stay together, while Nick maintained he needed to look out for his future.
They broke up the day Nick actually signed up, with Ryan declaring that Nick must not care, and he refused to be there when Nick actually headed for boot camp. Although Nick attempted to reach out to him, none of his messages had ever been responded to. In his unit, he met another soldier whom he fell for — her name was Alyssa. Again, the relationship had to be secretive, as she was technically a superior officer. They’d met after his basic training, and were together until he was discharged. It would have been one hell of a long distance relationship for them both, and they parted amicably, still checking up on each other now and again.
Since he got back, he hadn’t dated. He wasn’t in a good position to take care of himself, let alone be around another person intimately, especially after he’d begun drinking. With a mild growl, Nick turned the TV off. It was clear that he wasn’t going to get things off of his mind, so maybe getting out and letting off a little steam would help. Leaving Chase at home, he headed out to one of the better strip clubs to try to enjoy the show, and maybe a lap dance or two before calling it a night.